Libreville, the experience

By Mark van den Broek, Libreville

Meintjeskop Ditaba No 1/1998

The mission in Libreville, Gabon is responsible for our relations with six countries in the Central African Sub-region, namely: Cameroon, the Central African Republic, Chad, Equatorial Guinea, Gahon and Sao Tomé e Principe.

First, a little something (dry, formal, blah-blah-blah) about the country and city from which the officials of this mission maintain these relations:

As with the rest of the region, it would appear that Gabon’s history is defined through its steady colonisation. The first European traders arrived in the 15th century, namely Portuguese navigators, who arrived from Sao Tomé Island. They were followed by the Dutch and then the British, although relations between these visitors and the indigenous people stayed sporadic and superficial. French explorers began to penetrate inland after I839, after King Koewe Rapontchomho, also known as King Denis, signed a treaty with the French.

After a long period of French colonisation of Gabon, Leon Mba  led Gabon to Independence on August 17 1960 and became its first President. His then Vice President Albert-Rene Bongo (now known as El Hadj Omar Bongo) became Gabon's second President with President Mha's death in 1967.

President Bongo founded the PDG (Partie Democratique Gabonais) in 1968 as the only legal party.

In the late 1980’s, democratic reforms involving free elections with multiparty participation as well as a new constitution, became  politically imperative. In 1990, a new National Assembly was formed for a 5-year term composed of I20 deputies of which 4:5 per cent represented opposition parties.

 After the political turmoil and unrest that followed the Presidential election of December 1993 (which gave President Bongo 51% of the vote), formal negotiations were held between the government and the opposition in Paris, culminating in the signing of the "Paris Accords".

The cabinet was reconstituted as   a "Government of National Unity" under a new caretaker Prime Minister, the task of organising free and transparent local, parliamentary and senatorial elections, which finally took place towards the end of 1996. The next Presidential election is expected to be held during November or December 1998.

Economically speaking, Gabon relies mainly on its oil industry, timber and, to a very small degree, manganese and uranium mining, for export earnings. Gabon has the highest per capita  income in Sub-Saharan Africa should one exclude the Seychelles. The local currency is the CFA Franc, which is tied to the French Franc at an exchange rate of IOO to 1.

Libreville is the capital of Gabon and in 1996 had an estimated population of approximately 575,000, of which approximately one third is expatriate Africans. There are some 9,000 Europeans, the vast majority of whom are French (many being military families and "co-operants" sent to assist in the government services). The city grew rapidly after independence, from 18,000 in in the mid 1950’s to nearly 170,000 in 1970.

The city takes its name the settlement organised by the French navy in August I849 for 50 freed adult slaves and two children of Vili origin from the Congo who were rescued several years before from  the slaving ship "Elizia". In 1846, the slaves were freed and transported to the fort on the "Plateau," where the Presidential Palace is now located .This small portion of the northern bank of the estuary came to be called Libreville.  After that bit of formality down to the real brass tacks

After 16 months in Gabon, and after visits to four of the neighbouring countries (only Equatorial Guinea remains to remains to be explored), I realised that, despite all its best intentions, the Training Institute failed to bring a few things to be attention. Hence, I herewith present:

SEVEN NEEDFUL THINGS NEVER COVERED IN TRAINING

1.            Sand surf … and unwanted guests at your Christmas guests at your Christmas celebrations.

Picture the scene: first posting, tropical environment, beach, sun, surf, one week before Christmas 1996, relaxing with newly found friends in the local  community, some of the kids having a bright idea: let’s bury Mark, a nice guy really, in the sand.

Yes, wonderful, obviously the effects of the tropical sun  had long turned my brain to mush and my logical reasoning capacity  was about as potent as a gnat’s …. sneeze, 

So bury me it was with great gusto and participation from said twit. Great.  Until about three hours later, at home when the interminable itching started. ´Mmm” I thought (brain flash). “Something isn’t quite right.”  Quite right, brain box, 40 unwanted guests for Christmas: sandworms.

Didn’t see anything of use in this regard in the training nodules.

All’s well that ends well. The worms gave up after two months  (I guess they finally realised  that they gate-crashed my Christmas party)  Mom stopped insisting that I give up this foolhardy venture after 6 months, and my friends finally move closer than a metre after 12. Halitosis se moer!

2. Air-conditioning as a Zen experience

Temperatures ranging from the high twenties to mid thirties with roughly 80% to 90% humidity. Words fail me. A description like “roiling, shimmering wavelets of heat unfold before me as I struggle bravely to take another step” is useless (and pathetic imagery in any case. But, aah, the moment of bliss, of divine inspiration: my office.

No, really. Never had I imagined the powerful emotions and the subsequent sense of ultimate, serene calm and sense of oneness with all things that can result from merely stepping into a South African embassy. Air-conditioning: truly Zen, truly Nirvana.

Course suggestion: air conditioning and the Ozone hole: the upside to increased exposure to the Ozone hole to dangerous UV rays.

3. Negotiating techniques and avoiding the pitfalls of conflict

No matter what anyone tells you about their negotiating capacities, there are always a few situations in life that cannot, could never, and will never be resolved through the application of ANY negotiating technique, namely:

·         Genghis Khan’s indifference to the effect of sharp pointy things on the relationship which should exist between the average human head and the accompanying pair of shoulders.

·         The average taxi driver’s interpretation of globally accepted norms of road use; and   The African pothole, a true legend to the time (and probably the source of all the earth that went into creating the Himalayas.)

4. Handling praise

On the Junior Management Course, it was pointed out time and again how important it was to handle praise properly. All rather immaterial, in my opinion, given the average level of praise-doling experienced maybe it is just me … hmm.

Anyway let’s see how any of you would handle the following accolade received by the official (no really) for providing contact details for some South African universities:

“Dear Harald

(*note: official’s second name no longer used in official correspondence)

You have been very Powerful and Wonderful throughout 1997. May the good God give you Goodness so that you have nice days during 1998.”

Isn’t that nice??? My head is still spinning.

5. The joys of bachelorhood

Being a single diplomat abroad for all the freedom one might imagine it ought to bring, also results in situations of a more awkward persuasion.

Ever had a total stranger write to you to tell you that she thinks you her sister would be perfect for you and would really like a South African boyfriend, if not husband, as  this would open up endless opportunities for her sister to live and study in South Africa?

No? Well, apparently the sister in question has always approved of her sibling’s  choice of potential partners, is currently studying in Russia, and lists travelling , movies, music and basketball as her main interests. Oh, apparently she would please one greatly and is 23 years old. Any takers out there? Call me and I’ll get her number in Moscow.

Let’s see, under what course module would this fall? Beats me.

6. Answering those routine letters that really make life interesting:

Part of any official’s posting abroad will be, at some point or another, expose said official to Documents. Not only that, that the official might even he expected to read such documents. Amongst these one normally finds loads of letters written by individuals out there who seem hell – bent on tearing you away just when the paint was beginning to dry really nicely. In some cases (heaven forbid) an official  might even he expected  to respond (shudder).

Let's see if any of you respond to this letter from a Dr Takor Takor, which apparently wended its way around some pretty mighty halls before being sent to our bastion of scientific and scientific excellence, the Council for Scientific and Industrial Research (CSIR).

For the sake of world peace and the minimal embarrassment of any fellow members of the community of nations, the country of origin has been removed:(And, once again, I quote ad verbatim ):

"PRESIDENT NELSON MANDELA

TO THE HONOURABLE PRESIDENT

OF SOUTH AFRICA, PRETORIA -

DURBAN

Dear Sir,

I am a Medical Doctor teaching in the Country X Medical School here in Capital City y. I am a citizen of Country X doing a lot of research. Here are the slides  and photocopies (32 PHOTOCOPIES,  30 SLIDES ‘notes: none provided representing the findings that have resulted from this work)

THE ATTENTION OF YOUR SCIENTISTS IS DRAWN TO THE FOLLOWING ITEMS:

i. THE NEW PERIODIC TABLE OF 156 CHEMICAL ELEMENTS HAS 3 NEW ENRICHING GASES (AHAZON, ZAFMAIGON, NAAKHBQN) some of, which are in the South African mines. These gases are better enrichers than helium. Rational exploitation of them  will give you handsome dividends  necessary for our ambitious expansion schemes in housing and education..

ii. THE ASTRONOMICAL FINDINGS SHOW DETAILS CONTRARY TO PRESENT OPINION

.

iii. MATHEMATICAL FORMULAE ARE INCLUDED FOR USE BY THE PLANE MAKERS OF YOUR COUNTRY.

We have deliberately omitted many slides, because of the unstable nature of the politics of your country. When all the elements are aggregated in peace and constructive government we in future send such material that enable new aircraft and alloys to be built.. Should any scientist need slides, a donation to cover cost of production and photography will be highly commendable  with  any requests."

Ja well, no fine.

So, to all of you out there So, to all of you out there who thought that Libreville was just another cushy posting or maybe even a tough African assignment, think again. Clearly one's sanity (or insanity, as the two terms are quite relative and related) is daily exercised strenuously on a daily basis. I myself must confess to a great level of unfitness.

No, seriously, at the end of the day  (if I may end with a platitude), every posting is what you make it, no posting is "the" posting ad in an ideal world, I’d be there and you’d be here.

SOME LIGHTER MOMENTS IN THE EMBASSY

Lynn Crossley, Libreville

Here follows a quote from a letter to the Ambassador, written in the home language (French):

                                                                                                                                                01 April 1996

RE: REQUEST FOR YOUR HELP ON THE OCCASION OF MY CUSTOMARY WEDDING

Excellency

I have a quick feeling and of modesty at the place of your renowned personality. Allow me also, Mr Ambassador, to express to you the globality of the problem I experience.

IN fact, our African requirements are such that we must pay homage to them. So I practice at the General Secretary of the Ministry of Justice and I am remunerated as a non permanent work force.

In other respects, I accuse monetary difficulties compared to what I get monthly but only I am at the stage of preparations.

That is why, Mr Ambassador,, I would beg you to please accede to this heavy task.

Convinced I dare believe in the sincere will towards the content of this correspondence.

Please accept, Mr Ambassador, my respects in the recognition of my highest consideration.

List of different goods which must be submitted to the in-laws:

1      Foreign beers (various)

2     Machetes (a pair)

3     Axe and file

4     Mosquito net

5     Liqueurs (30) and sweets

6     Basket

7     Can of oil and a bag of rice

       Big fish

Signed by a hopeful husband-to-be.