Emperor Bokassa |
By Andre Jaquet
By some quirk of fate my first duties
at the Department of Foreign Affairs Head Office included spreading South
Africa’s influence in Francophone Africa. This meant intensive shuttle diplomacy,
often at inconvenient times, to try and achieve the impossible for a country
under apartheid rule. One Christmas in the 70’s I was stuck in the Central
African Empire on a hush-hush mission to deliver the latest token of the South
African taxpayer’s generosity. This was a sort of Christmas present for Jean
Bedel Bokassa, who had crowned himself Emperor.
Bokassa had been foisted on the South
African taxpayer by the French government that was tired of funding Bokassa’s
Napoleonic dreams. Paris managed to sell the idea of palling up to Bokassa to
the South African Cabinet by pointing out that this was a useful means for
South Africa to start gaining acceptance in Africa.
Now anyone with distant Swiss
ancestors will tell you that Christmas is not Christmas unless you make two
full cake tins of Bruenslis. Forget mince pies or kissing under the mistletoe, spurn
Christmas pudding with brandy butter and throw the fatted goose or whatever to
the cats. As a non-Brit, I am not excited by those reminders of British
colonization and I tolerate the traditional South African Christmas braai only
because it gives me a good excuse to drink large quantities of Cabernet Sauvignon.
But give me a Bruensli and I am all yours.
“What on earth are Bruenslis?” you ask.
At this stage, I should warn diabetics to take an extra dose of insulin before
reading the following quotation from my mother’s hand-written recipe book:
BRUENSLIS:
CHOCOLATE BISCUITS: BONBONS BRUNS
Ingredients:
250gr of chopped almonds
250gr
of sugar
2
whites of eggs
80gr
cocoa powder
4
gr cinnamon.
Mix well. Let the dough rest. Roll out
with sugar, cut out.Oven: mild. Just dry the biscuits out.
That sounds easy, unless you try to
bake those cookies on a hotplate in an un-air-conditioned hotel room in the
middle of the tropical hot season in Bangui, capital of the Central African
Empire.
Having bowed and scraped to the
Emperor, I returned to my hotel from the palace in the jungle and I somehow managed
to put together three whole pseudo-Bruenslis using sugar, Milo and peanuts. Mind you, I had to eat them with a spoon but I
suppose that tradition deserves some sacrifices.
Bruenslis were also a wonderful
comfort when I was on Operations Room duty at Head Office one Christmas eve.
There was absolutely nothing to do because all colleagues, whether on posting abroad
or at home, were doing the sensible thing. That year I fielded just one phone
call from a journalist at midnight. The conversation went something like this: “Hello
(Munch) this is Foreign Affairs. (Crunch). How can I help you? (Swallow). No,
we have not invaded the Comoros Islands over the weekend. Goodbye and a merry
Christmas to you too.”
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